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12 Tips for Coping With Stress During Pregnancy

How to Gain Control of Your Life

By Henry Lerner, M.D., OB/GYN

Updated May 15, 2014

As a psychologist friend of mine once told me if you don't feel stress in your life you're not paying attention. Everyone experiences stress, even pregnant women. What is not clear, however, is whether stress can have harmful affects on pregnancy.

For years obstetricians have looked to see whether an increase in stressful events can either cause miscarriage, result in preterm delivery, or in some other way harm a fetus. Up until recently the consensus had been that while excessive physical work can bring on preterm labor, emotional stress did not seem to have negative effects on pregnancy outcomes. This conclusion, however, has recently been challenged. There now is information to indicate that stress can cause the body to produce certain hormones that can perhaps cause miscarriage and that very likely can bring on preterm labor. Additionally, even if doctors have no "smoking gun" linking stress with negative pregnancy outcomes, pregnant women would want to decrease the amount of stress they have to contend with just because of how unpleasant it makes them feel. These emotional consequences of stress can range from a mild sense of being overwhelmed to severe episodes of depression. They can eventually lead to pregnant women feeling withdrawn and being unable to function.

Are there things pregnant women can do to reduce the stress they have and to change how it makes them feel? The answer is yes. Below are listed several techniques that both women and the clinicians who care for them have found useful in helping to relieve the sense that life is getting out of control. I have divided these techniques into two groups: (1) readjusting your lifestyle to reduce stress and (2) specific maneuvers and activities you can do to change how you feel -both physically and emotionally-about the stress you are under.

Gaining control of your life:

1. Take a close look at your lifestyle. Make yourself do this on paper. Look at your work activities, home and family responsibilities, other obligations (church, community activities, clubs and organizations to which you belong). Then look to see how "doable" it is. Make sure you include in your calculations time for yourself for such activities as exercise, down time, and socializing Once you have done this, be honest with yourself as you ask the following: Is this schedule achievable? Sustainable? Satisfying? If not, accept the reality that you have to change the schedule.

2. Accept the fact that even if you currently can thrive on your busy and demanding lifestyle, you likely will not be able to sustain it as pregnancy progresses and makes more physical demands on you. Therefore prepare yourself to cut back on what you're doing and to allow yourself more time for rest and relaxation. You will need to sleep more. You will need to change the time you a lot for meals to make sure that you are able to eat a balanced diet. You will feel better if you allow time to engage in a reasonable exercise program. Finally you will need to allow yourself some "mental growth" time. This is time for reading, thinking, and planning for the new, incredibly important role of mother you will soon assume.

3. Be prepared to give up some control over the life-style you have worked so hard to attain. Many things about pregnancy are not in your control. You may experience severe morning sickness. You may have overwhelming fatigue. You may develop a pregnancy complication requiring hospitalization or home bed rest. For many women, especially those who have demanding jobs, the thought that biology might interfere with their responsibilities borders on the intolerable. But it happens. Be prepared to accept this.

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