"For Women Only- A Revolutionary Guide For Women to Overcoming Sexual Dysfunction and Reclaiming Your Sex Life"

An Interview With Dr. Laura Berman

Have you ever experienced sexual dysfunction? If you have, you are not alone! According to an article published in the "Journal of the American Medical Association", 43 percent of women suffer from sexual dysfunction. Female sexual dysfunction has been ignored by the majority of the medical community, while male sexual dysfunction has been the topic of a wealth of research and treatment.

Dr. Jennifer Berman and Dr. Laura Berman are experts about the issues surrounding female sexual dysfunction. They examine female sexuality and dysfunction in their book "For Women Only", on their website the Network For Excellence In Women's Sexual Health (NEWSHE), and as founders and co-directors of the Center for Women's Urology and Sexual Medicine at the UCLA Medical Center. The Berman sisters are also the former co-directors of the Women's Sexual Health Clinic at Boston University Medical Center. You have probably seen them on television shows including Good Morning America, Oprah, and NBC Later Today.

Dr. Jennifer Berman is a urologist with specialized training in female sexual dysfunction. Her sister, Laura Berman Ph.D has worked as a sex educator and therapist for over 10 years, and completed her Master's in Clinical Social Work and Doctorate in Health Education and Therapy (specializing in human sexuality) at New York University. She completed a training fellowship in Sexual Therapy with the Department of Psychiatry, New York University Medical Center.

This week I interviewed Dr. Laura Berman about "For Women Only," and the issue of female sexual dysfunction:

Q. Why did you write "For Women Only"? What do you hope women will learn from reading your book?

A. For most of this century, doctors have dismissed women's sexual complaints as either psychological or emotionally based. We hope the book will serve as an antidote to what women have heard for decades. The problem is not "just in your head". You are not crazy, or alone, of fated never to have an orgasm or feel sexual again. Our goal in the book is to arm women with the information they need about their bodies and sexual response and to provide then with a full spectrum of options for treatment. We believe that what women and their partners learn from the book will eliminate much frustration and despair and help them lead fuller, more sexually satisfied lives.

Q. What signs may indicate that a woman has a sexual problem?

A. In order for a woman to be considered as having a sexual disorder, the symptoms must be persistent and pervasive and her problem must cause her personal distress. Sexual dysfunction can be psychological, physiological or a combination. Symptoms can include: vaginal dryness, decreased genital sensation, difficulty achieving orgasm, genital pain with or without sexual contact, lack of sexual interest. Other underlying problems can include history of abuse, pelvic surgery (hysterectomy, pregnancy, straddle injuries), medicines, hormonal problems and blood flow problems.

Q. What are the most common sexual dysfunctions experienced by women?

A. We have identified four classifications of female sexual dysfunction:

1. Hypoactive Sexual Desire Disorder: A lack of sexual desire that causes a woman personal distress. Includes a persistent or recurring deficiency or absence of sexual fantasies or thoughts.
   
   
2. Sexual Arousal Disorder: An inability to attain or maintain adequate genital lubrication, swelling or other somatic responses, such as nipple sensitivity.
   
   
3. Orgasmic Disorder: A difficulty or inability to reach orgasm after sufficient sexual stimulation and arousal.
   
   
4. Sexual Pain Disorders: These include dyspareunia, which is recurrent or persistent genital pain associated with sexual intercourse.

Q. How should a woman talk to her partner about a sexual problem?

A. Realize that communication is the most important part of identifying and dealing with a sexual problem. The first rule is honesty - let your partner know what you like and want, but never fake an orgasm. The best time to talk is not during sex. Set aside time to talk about what's bothering you.

If your partner is dismissive at first, keep trying. For instance, some partners who act impatient with a partner's problems are really feeling insecure and taking it personally that their partner is not responding sexually. They don't want to consider that they may have a causative role in the problem. You can try educational videos, books and experimenting with what is learned. Therapy is always a good choice, but it may not be available, the partner may refuse to go or the couple may feel uncomfortable.

Q. What is the best way for women to reach orgasm? Is sexual intercourse necessary for orgasm? Is one position better than another?

A. First, let go of the goal-oriented approach. Orgasms are not the center point of sex. Focus on sensuality. Once we let go of becoming orgasm-focused, sex becomes much more of an act of intimacy, connection, eroticism and arousal.

There is no one orgasm that is better than another. There are several techniques to enhance orgasm with intercourse including trying different positions, and practicing kegel exercises to strengthen the pelvic floor muscles. Intercourse is not necessary for orgasm as demonstrated by our VENIS techniques (see below).

Q. What role do birth control pills, hormone replacement therapy, antidepressants, and other drugs play in female sexual dysfunction?

A. Many commonly prescribed medicines can cause a variety of sexual complaints ranging from vaginal dryness and low arousal to vaginal itching and orgasmic disorder.

Q. How do normal life events such as pregnancy and menopause affect female sexual function and/or desire?

A. Problems related to the production of the hormones estrogen and testosterone can lead to sexual dysfunction. Menopause, endocrine disorders, pregnancy and postpartum deficiencies, endometriosis, diabetes and fibroids can all affect sexual function because of the way in which hormones are released or suppressed.

Q. What is VENIS?

A. This stands for Very Erotic Non Insertive Sex, an alternative to intercourse; a program developed by Dr. Laura Berman that teaches ways to give sexual pleasure and orgasm through activities that do not require erections.

Q. Many women feel uncomfortable talking to their doctors about sexual problems. How can women talk to their doctor about sexual problems without feeling embarrassed?

A. Talking with your doctor about your sexual problems can cause you anxiety, but in order to get the best care you must be able to communicate your needs. Some doctors may minimize your problem or dismiss it, but that's usually because they don't know how to help, they think it may be psychological, or they are not aware of potential treatment. Arm yourself with information found on newshe.com as well as "For Women Only". Information you take to your doctor will be extremely helpful to him or her as well as to you. Most doctors will be open and receptive to your comments and will be happy to learn of any new information, particularly if it is based on science and research.

Q. What else do you believe women should understand about female sexuality?

A. That sex, like life, is fluid. It changes and grows just as women do. Sex at 20 is not like sex at 30 nor sex when you're a mother, nor sex when you are menopausal, nor sex when you are crazy about your partner or when you are furious with him or her. The context in which women experience their sexuality is probably the most important part of understanding it. The brain is the main sexual organ and sex is about intimacy, sharing, trust, and making yourself vulnerable to another person. It is a basic part of our general health and wellness and something every woman is entitled to.

A special thank you to Dr. Laura Berman for taking time from her busy schedule to answer my questions. "For Women Only" is a must have book for women experiencing any degree of sexual dysfunction. Its friendly style makes it an easy-read, filled with solutions, for women of all ages confronted with sexual issues.

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