Abstinence Is The Best Policy
The only 100 percent sure way to protect yourself is to not have sex. It only takes one sexual contact with someone who has an STD to catch it. Despite all the references to sex in the popular media, it is possible to be in a committed relationship and not have sex. You just have to decide that that is what you want and then make sure that your partner understands that you are serious about it.
Abstaining from sexual activity does not mean that you can't express your feelings for your partner, says Gail E. Wyatt, Ph.D., a noted psychologist, author, and professor at UCLA. Kissing on the mouth, ears, and neck can be loving, and even massages, dancing, and hugging can show your feelings.
"Sex is kissing, holding hands, and saying warm and tender things to each other, and cuddling," says Dr. Wyatt. "So, if that's what you want, just say to your partner, 'What I want is to be held, clear and simple.'"
SIECUS, the Sexuality Information and Education Council of the United States, suggests, winding down at the end of a long day by exchanging foot rubs-it can be soothing and playful and can release muscle tension.
Monogamy
If you decide to be sexually active, the safest route is with a mutually faithful, uninfected partner. To be completely sure that both you and your partner are uninfected, you will have to be tested. It is not enough to "trust" your partner. It is important to wait until you are absolutely certain about your partner's health history. Your life may depend on it.
Make sure to receive treatment if an infection is diagnosed and talk to your doctor about steps you need to take to control the infection and to not infect others. Remember, only a doctor can tell whether or not someone is infected since some STDs don't have noticeable symptoms, so both of you have to get tested.
Condom Use Essential
If you are going to be sexually active, you should make condom use a habit. Using a condom is still considered the best way to protect you from HIV and many other STDs, but it is by no means foolproof.
Although condoms are found to be completely safe in the laboratory, human error can decrease the effectiveness in the real world. In order to stay completely protected, make sure you use a condom every time and make sure to put the condom on before any contact. Always avoid sexual activity when using drugs or alcohol, because they can impair your judgement and your ability to use the condom correctly.
Next: What To Do When He Won't Wear A Condom
